The Linzer Torte - The Cooking Adventure (first in a series)
With the best of intentions (we all know where that paved road leads) ,I promised to create and bring a culinary delight to my charming colleagues as an early holiday gift. Alas, on the momentous night of its preparation, a total failure of the heating system struck our household. Now, Dear Reader, I would like to be able to report of the unparalleled success of my adventure into gourmandy; however, that is not the case. My significant others felt, quite to my astonishment, that my efforts would be better served if I were to, and I hereby paraphrase my ultimate significant other, “stop worrying about a frickin’ torte and get the heat on.” Grasping (with little assistance mind you) that the logic of the additional heat provided by a cooking oven did not overcome the significant lack of appeal of a cold house - I mean, really, people don’t sleep on their kitchen floor next to the stove in the dead of winter waiting for a torte to finish its baking? Isn’t it closer to the coffee pot? Nonetheless, in the best interest of spousal harmony not to mention the thought of how cold a couch would be in a home with no heat and the lack of additional body warmth provided by most significant other (most likely forever), I blew off the torte. Upon waking the next day in a most displeased state (no torte and the extra body warmth thing never materialized), I reported to work the next day, which I will be happy to tell you about in the next installment.
By Scott (with significant contribution by Ms. Magaw which is hereby acknowledged)